Wednesday has a deadline.

[Chahee Side Note: Ok, I just checked this…someone actually left a constructive comment. I love it. I love it because I had already made this post title before I read this comment.]

Anonymous said...
Dump this guy or post of list of 10 things that you like about Mr. Make Out. And not lame shit like "good smile" or "has a job". Specific stuff. You have 48 hours to decide.

So, I’m starting with 10 things I like about Mr. Make Out (we know how this is going to go).

No offense “Anonymous” (I think we should be friends, btw…find me on Facebook!), but “good smile” would never make my list (it’s ok—his smile that is)…and while he has a “job” it’s not exactly brag worthy (I’m trying to refrain from being too mean—we are still “dating”).

Ok, so 10 things I like about Mr. Make Out:

1. He’s good at making out…(there’s something antiseptic about his breath…it’s the alcohol). I mean I enjoy it (the kissing, not the alcohol or the cheep vodka breath).
2. That time we fooled around, I didn’t have to make any suggestions about how he could do it better (but let’s face it that was only because I was so shocked he was touching my penis).
3. He can get us a discount at one of my favorite bars (not that we can go anymore because he's been court ordered to refrain from going to bars).
4 , 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

Ok, that list didn’t go so well (as predicted)… But I’ve already set a timetable for breaking up with him anyway. If I don’t hear from him by this Friday (that’s 5 days of no contact), it’s over (first weekend as single Chahee). It may sound lame; however, I feel that letting him drift off into the world is better than to post “It’s over dude” on his wall (what? Even I wouldn’t break up with someone via Facebook).

You know, I’m not that broken up about it (probably because I’ve had a while to think about the situation and a lot of evidence to back me up). I’ve decided to write this whole thing off as an experiment. I mean I put up with a lot more than I ever expected, and I hung in there a lot longer than I think I should have. And I don’t think I lead him on.

And if you’re giving me the side eye for letting him drift off instead of confronting him, let’s all remember that the Bartender and I never had the “break up” conversation (I just called him like a psychotic and he decided to leave me be) and we “dated” for like 4 months (oh god)… I never had a conversation with either Cookie or the Whale when we broke up (true, those were imaginary relationships that I had with them in my head), but I knew both of them far longer; and neither party felt it necessary to say… “It’s not you, it’s me.”

It’s only been like 2 ½ months (I had to double check that with my BlackBerry calendar, it feels like an eternity) with Mr. Make Out, so, after 5 days of no contact, I’m officially changing my status to single… Now, having said that, if I should happen to get a message from Mr.MO during that 5 day span (I’m not giving up all hope), I will respectfully request a phone call (so I can break up with him that way—if his phone is working again). Honestly, it’s only been 2 ½ months… We’re not serious; we haven’t even had sex yet. I think a Facebook message is all that necessary at this point; however, I’m wanting phone…

I’m definitely giving it more respect than it deserves (and yes, I know I’m lame; but hey, it’s all I’ve got).